Sometimes the truth hits me in unexpected moments. As I was writing a previous entry, I typed without thinking the phrase "tested faith" to describe this season of my life. I immediately paused and realized there was something more there to explore.  Here is that exploration:

     One of my favorite books of the Bible has always been 1 Peter. It opens with a joyful reminder of our heavenly inheritance and the security we have in Christ. Then Peter jumps right into the gritty reality of life on this side of eternity. "You rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith — more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire — may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ" (1 Peter 1:6-7). That's a bit of a complicated sentence, let's unpack it:

     Gold is tested by fire, which reveals the impurities so that they can be removed as the gold melts. Through testing, genuine gold is revealed. But even the purest gold will one day perish (or perhaps be repurposed into pavement in heaven!). Peter's point is that faith, which is much more precious than gold, is also tested. Gold is tested by fire and made more pure; what tests and purifies our faith? Trials.

     "Trial" is a bit of a vague term in the Bible. It can mean "temptation" (as in Matthew 6:13, 1 Corinthians 10:13, etc). It can mean a test (as in Hebrews 3:8, 1 Peter 4:12, etc). It can mean a burden (see Galatians 4:14). Or just difficult circumstances (as in Luke 22:28, Acts 20:19, etc). So what Peter is saying here is probably a double meaning. The difficult circumstances of life - in the case of Peter's audience, being persecuted for following Jesus - serve as a test of our faith.

     If my faith is only present in favorable times, it is not genuine. If my faith departs when difficulties enter my life, it is not genuine. This is the fate of the seed sown on rocky soil. Jesus says as much in Luke 8:13, "The ones on the rock are those who, when they hear the word, receive it with joy. But these have no root; they believe for a while, and in time of testing fall away." Faith is easy when the weather is good, our bodies are healthy, our bank balance is sufficient, and friends support us. When losses hit hard, when friends and finances flee, when bodies break and groan, if we fall away then our hope was not in God but in his gifts.  The one who suffers under trials is forced to ask, Do I still trust God? Do I confess that he is good, wise, and mighty?  Do I look to Christ to give me all I need? That is the testing of faith. And faith that is tested and proven genuine is precious indeed.

     Writing to Christians as the Roman Empire crumbled, Augustine of Hippo weighed the question of why some who called themselves Christians cursed God during the crisis while others worshipped him. Did the suffering itself cause them to reject God? Augustine argued that no, the trial does not create the character of a person. The trial reveals what was already there:

"Thus the wicked, under pressure of affliction, execrate God and blaspheme; the good, in the same affliction, offer up prayers and praises. This shows what matters is the nature of the sufferer, not the nature of the sufferings. Stir a cesspit, and a foul stench arises; stir a perfume, and a delightful fragrance ascends. But the movement is identical."

(from Augustine's City of God, page 14)

     Job and his wife suffered the same losses. Her response was "Curse God and die!" Job's response was "Blessed be the name of the Lord!" Same trial, but only one was shown to have faith.

     What Peter writes and what Augustine illustrates is what I hope I am  demonstrating in my life. In this illness and all the sad news that follows after it, I am undergoing a trial. My faith is tested. Will I stay faithful to God only so long as he gives me what I think is good and right? That's not faith. That requires little or no trust. But faith that follows God through the valleys of weeping and hardship shows itself to be genuine.

     Another Biblical author, James, adds this encouragement: "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness." (James 1:2-3). James' observation is that tested and proven faith is stronger. Once we learn that we can trust God in the hard times, we are better able to trust him in the not-as-hard times. And in the even-harder times.

     So perhaps this will all be a short chapter in a much longer story of my life. Or perhaps the Lord plans to bring me home sooner than I expected. Either way, this season of life is the stirring of the pot, a trial to show whether a foul stench or a delightful fragrance arises. I did not ask to be tested in this way, but I try to count it all joy nevertheless, because as Peter said earlier, that tested genuineness of my faith will result in praise, glory, and honor.